Unfortunately some people get married and don’t end up happily ever after. Something goes wrong along the way, or maybe it was doomed from the start, either way, today divorce is like a Mac, more and more of your friends are getting one. Whatever the circumstances were that sent you on a search for your pit bull lawyer, whatever horrendously hurtful, awful thing your husband or wife did, tried to do or wanted to do, from the bottom of my heart, I am truly sorry that you were hurt, embarrassed, lied to, cheated on, or made to feel less than. The first year or point until your divorce is finalized is the hardest, this is when you spend the better part of Saturday night curled up on the bathroom floor crying hysterically because you’re all alone and your kids are with your future ex and you glance at your red nosed puffy faced self in the mirror and that makes you cry even more thinking how awful you look and who the hell would ever want to be with you looking like that? Unless of course you’re a man and then you’re probably out on a Saturday night with some 22 year old Gossip Girls wannabe that one of your buddies set you up with to “make you feel better”. Therefore, a healthy amount of bashing does not make you look bad, it’s actually understandable and pretty much part of the healing process. Your friends are there for you and ready to carry fire-lit torches to ‘kill the beast’ at 3am in case his 22 year old mistress has already claimed him as her own.
Now it’s time for the three little words that you desperately need to hear.
Get Over It!
Bashing has an expiration date, and if you don’t abide by it, your friends will be sick of hearing about it, and the chances of having your happily ever after become infinitesimally slim.
Turn in your broomstick before you become a clunker.
clunk⋅er [kluhng-ker]
1. something worthless or inferior.
2. Also, klunker. an old, worn-out vehicle or machine.
(ok so you’re not a car but it still makes sense)
Choosing a broomstick as your mode of transportation is repulsive, unless you think the green faced wicked witch from the original Wizard of Oz is attractive (by the way, to this day I can’t watch that movie because the witch and her flying monkeys still give me nightmares).
Nobody likes a bitter angry spiteful woman, and honestly it makes you look very ugly no matter how physically beautiful you might be. More importantly, it takes more energy maintaining an ugly bitch persona than it does to be the bigger better person and do the right thing. What makes matters worse, is the extreme broomstick flying wicked witch of the north, south, east or west that drags the kids into it, or uses them as weapons!
Lastly, flying around on a broomstick is sure to give you a bad case of wind burn which inevitably turns your face into a wrinkled road map and that’s definitely not pretty.
p.s. "Anger/Revenge is like swallowing poison and hoping the other person dies" .......think about it.
After a time, the healing starts and there is no longer emotion attached to the ex. Sometimes recalling any experience brings the emotion attached to the memory, but then it all goes away just as quickly. That works the same way for enjoyable memories as well as those that hurt.
ReplyDeleteI agree totally with your story. As the time goes by, you realize how wonderful it is to be yourself and not what someone else wanted you to be. It takes that brick off your back. You then look at your ex and wonder why you wasted all that time crying and feeling sorry for yourself. Don't forget there is a reason that he is now "The Ex".
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